Not “Just” Mum: Balancing Motherhood and Your Personal Life (Episode 34)

In this episode, we explore the journey of being a loving, caring mum while rediscovering your individual interests and passions. You're more than "just" a mum, and it's important to nurture your interests and wellbeing. Learn how to start small, prioritise yourself, and follow your joy. Your happiness matters, mama!

Explore further support with the Calm Resilient Mama Project for finding time for yourself and your interests.

Transcript:

“Welcome to the Calm Resilient Mama Podcast. I’m Cindy Graham-Schmidt. I’m a Life Coach and mama of two. On this podcast I share with you coaching tools and tips to help you deal with challenges that life and motherhood throw at you. I will help you to enjoy your life more TODAY, because tomorrow isn’t promised to anyone.


Hey mama,

How are you?

I don’t know about you, but I love being a mum AND I still want to be more than “just” a mum.

I want to feel passion and purpose in other areas of my life too. I want to feel seen as more than “just” a mum.

Now I said more than “just” a mum a couple of times and that is NOT to diminish the role of being a mother at all. It’s definitely not, because I honestly think that what we do as mothers; as primary caregivers is amazing and so, so important. I mean we’re raising the next generation. How could that not be utterly important?

However, I also think that we need something outside of motherhood - whether you’re a stay-at-home-mum or you do paid work. We need something that makes us feel like ourselves. Something that makes us love life. Something that truly matters to us - other than our kids. In fact, I think we need many of those “things”. And no, by “things” I don’t necessarily mean actual things or possessions. More often than not it’s about experiences, because that’s what life is made up of, lots of different experiences.

It’s so easy to get lost in motherhood.I know that from my own experience when my first-born was still little. My whole world suddenly basically only revolved around her for quite some time. And I loved that at first, but then I also realised how exhausting that is.

We can’t just be there for our little ones and forget about ourselves in the process completely. And yes, it’s not necessarily easy to make time for yourself and for the things that you love that have nothing to do with your little ones or your family as a whole. I want you to know though that it’s not impossible, even if it might feel like that for you right now.

My tip is always to start small. For example, let’s start with you listening to this podcast right now. That is for you! You’re taking a few minutes to do something for yourself and I applaud you for that. It’s little steps like that that can create change.

And while I have you here doing something for yourself, let’s think about what it is that you do want outside of motherhood. What would you like to make time for that is just for you as a person? Any hobbies or interests? Any new or old projects? What haven’t you done in ages, but would love to do again? What’s something you’ve never done before, but would like to try just for the fun of it? What’s something that sparks your curiosity and joy? What topics interest you that have nothing to do with parenting?

I encourage you to start with answering those questions and just see where it leads you. Follow the little nudges and take a few moments of your day to start dreaming and pondering. Do some self-reflection and pick one thing at a time to dive in a bit deeper. Explore who you are outside of motherhood and create little pockets of time where you can follow your interests and your joy.

Stay open and curious about where this might lead you.

Take that time for yourself and your family will thank you for it, because they will notice a difference in how you feel and in how you approach things. They love you and want you to be happy, and you being happier and more fulfilled can make a difference to their mood and their wellbeing too. So it’s a win win really even if it might not feel like that in the beginning. Don’t let your brain trick you into mum guilt thinking that you can’t possibly make time for your hobbies and interests, because your family needs you to be available to them 24/7. That’s a lie! Take a few minutes for yourself each day at the very least, because your wellbeing matters, mama. You matter; and not just as the mum of your little ones. You matter as a person! Please don’t ever forget that. You are a person worthy of having your own dreams, goals and aspirations. You matter!

And if you want support in making more time for you and your interests; your hobbies and your joy, check out the Calm Resilient Mama Project, my 1-on-1 coaching program, because this is exactly the kind of work we would do together. I can help you with the logistics and the mindset you need to prioritise yourself more even when you feel like there’s just not enough time in the day to look after yourself AND after your family and all their needs.

There’s always a way and I’d love to help you find yours.

That’s it from me for today. Take care & talk to you next time.”